writer....

i don't no how i write this(Don't hate me..).....hahahaha
now a days i can write like this.. good.
when i start writing blogs i never think i can write about me this much but i write about me, what was happened with me in past.
whenever i remember something i can read my blogs. thanks to blog spot where i can share my feelings.
until now i just write some serious blogs(i think). Actually i just write what i felt, which i cant share. now i m trying to write some interesting blogs, spl about Mumbai. but its depends on time, if i got enough time then only. i would like to write but.......

is this rite??

whats going on i dont no yaar...... why she is not ready to talk with me??
i don't no... i woulld like to know why it is so?? anything wrong happen from my side or bcz of she come to no that i like her therefor... i don't no.
i think in labuan to like someone is crime.........haha
mean time she received gift i sent to her.... its not perfect size..too big for her..haha.. gila lah. she just say thanks for gift. look like formal thanks for any unknown person.
that was a last gift from my side to her. if she thinking that each and everytime i'll send her gift without any reason then its wrong thinking. if she thinking i m still follow her, still think abt her, waiting for her then its totally wrong thinking by her. may be therfor she is not talking with me.
i m not child who didn't understand. i know everything but still i try to chat with her. bcz she is my frnd. i also have self respect. i can't see always these kind of reaction from her. look like i do something wrong and regrating for it..
why i should always try to chat with her??
bcz i want clear doubt from her mind if any doubt she having.. if there is no doubt in her mind and she just simply don't want to talk with me then its ok. i don't have any objection but she should clearly told me abt it.....i think.
Feelbad when i see she chat with my frnds and not with me.. when i saw she appear me offline.... any unknown people can become her frnd on facebook but not me..this is situation. a girl who used to inform me when she wasn't at desk that girl not even told me while go offline in middle of chat. why??
when there is any topic come from labuan my frnds look at me frst, bcz everybody knows abt our frndship, they think i m her close frnd. but they don't no cuurent situation....krazzyyy lah.
its ok lah.. i decide to not disturb her anymore.. just wish to explain her everything.... nothing more. hopefully...........

Don’t Hate Me......

Don’t Hate Me......

I m not good or bad person either....i think.
So, Don't Hate me....
Whatever happened was happened.
So, Don't Hate me....
Don't just believe what other told about me.
If u have any query regarding me pls ask me..
But, Don't Hate me....
If u don’t want to talk to me don’t talk..i am not forcing u
I feel guilty when i see ur reactions, current situation..
So, Don't Hate me....
sometime i feel i m criminal
and do big crime of liking someone..
So, Don't Hate me....
I know u have ur own choice own decision..i respect that,
I m not forcing u to love me..
So, Don't Hate me....
If u want to see my face smiley..
Please, Don't Hate me....
I know ur a good human being and u can understand me....
So, Please don’t hate me.......

Happy Diwali....

Diwali or Deepawali.... one of biggest festival in India. Mostly Hindu religion celebrate this festival but now a days everybody involve in this kind of festival.
Spl in Mumbai where each and every kind of people live. Each and every body celebrate Diwali here. Last year we were in Labuan where they not celebrate Diwali but last years Diwali was special for me. That day we work as not holiday in Labuan, then at nite we cook at home as normally and suddenly Melvin came with the gift of fruit for us to celebrate Diwali. That was unexpected. Then we celebrate Diwali with Melvin.....
This year we r here celebrating with our family. So, Happy Diwali to all of u.......

Abc...

I no this is going to happen, I m trying my best to communicate more with people, but..My communication become worst day by day. I don’t no what to do? I don’t like to talk rubbish, when somebody higher post person in front of me i don’t like to talk with him what i don’t no. I can just talk what i know. But some people can talk more in same situation, i don’t no how?
When i know 100% and when time come to explain it i just can explain 20-40%. In same situation some people, when they know 40% they can explain 90-95%. Therefore i m like this....

some...Sweet Memories..

While checking my mails i just read all old mails. And my mind stuck in reading some interesting and some sweet mails. All mails send by her, or she replied to my mail, i checked all mail. I found some mail send by her to me, she send to few people only and i m one of them, that’s really feel something different. Sometime feels like i m her one of close frnd but when i look at current situation feels like i m nothing.....
I used to send mail to all of my frnd in Labuan. Its not like i m sending mail to her only. But very few people reply to my mail. mostly gilion and she reply. I always going to do this, although she talk with me or not its upto her, but i m going to do my work.
Sometimes feel why i go second time to Labuan?? Better i m here and having chat with her as frnd, then this situation might not occur. Now, the situation is like this, if any Indian go there then her point of view towards him will be different. And its because of me. What i can do?? To like someone is not crime....rite??
I just listen my heart. But now feel like i do crime and i m criminal.
Between, Atul is in Labuan, 15 days training.... and i send one whiskey bottle for Melvin and one gift for her. Just last gift from my side for her B’day. I hope she will accept it. Actually i would like to give her on her B’day but not possible.......... so when he will return india he will give to her.
Rite now i m alone here in our newly rented house. Atul in Labuan, Santosh is on Leave, so i m alone here writing my blogs.

11 oct

After latenite work yesterday, until 12 i woke up 3 pm today. Haha funny.... actually nothing to do, i like to go home but 2mrow have to come again and Tuesday again holiday, so i decide to rest here and i’ll go 2mrow home. Just finish my lunch, after long time in McDonald i ate Burger today. When we were in S’pore we used to eat burger everyday. So rite now nothing to do, i have my Laptop with me, but no internet connection here. Atul also left for home as he will fly tonight for Labuan, Malaysia. Santosh already at home, so i m alone here, good chance to write something. From last days days i tried to send one mail to everyone in Labuan, regarding the photo i have with me. Annual dinner last year, Damien’s farewell party, and this years my B’day party. I would like to share those memory with all of them. So, i m working on that.

Happy Birthday “PAPPA”.....

Today its my father’s B’day. IMP day for me. Today is Friday, last day before weekend, but at work there is urgent work. I was in doubt to come home today but finally i manage to come. 2mrow i have to go back again but for Pappa i came.
He is My God, my role model, my idol, my Guru, my everything. Without him i m not here. He is not only give me born in this beautiful world but also fulfill all my requirement. He always advice to me, my bros, my sis and everyone for better future. And i feel proud after see himself on this position. This is Victory of my Father and Mother than me.
So while come home i brought Cake for my father. He told me after so many years i m going to cut the Cake. We should celebrate B’day before but unfortunately we not celebrate it. Last year i was not here, but this year i can. I call my sister to join, unfortunately my mother not here, she is in my native place. Maybe she will coming next week to Mumbai. After i reach home 10 pm my father cut the cake. The small celebration of B’day, Geeta bring one T-shirt for him. Nothing from me, as i decide to buy him something for diwali, as i don’t have time to buy today.

Jab We Met…….Anniversary

Today is anniversary of Jab We Met, means 1 year back when I fly to Labuan I met her, my dream girl. 6th oct. 2008. I cant forget that first eye contact with her. When I saw her that day I start to like her. From that day till today and forever….. first time I feel something…..also my first outdoor tour as well. How I can forget this tour??
But from that day to now situation is different. During one year lots of things happened. She not talk with me. Whatever happened was very bad, I thought we can be frnd but, everything goes wrong.
I decide today that I m going to say SORRY to her for whatever happened, I come to no that she is not ready to chat with me. She appear me offline from her YM or delete my id from it. Whatever it is one thing is clear she is not ready at all to talk with me. So I m also not going to disturb her. Only when there is official work is there I m going to chat with her. I saw that day I send her one mail regarding India’s beauty Kashmir. It having beautiful places to visit and she is interested to come India. Next day she ask Atul about those places….. I just smiled she can ask me but she didn’t ask me. From this come to no that she don’t want to talk with me. Its ok lah.